"What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? in that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.""I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out my nose."
"If my films don't show a profit, I know I'm doing something right."
"I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers."
"Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting questions."
"I have never been an intellectual, but I have this look."
"If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative."
"I took a speed reading course and read War And Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia."
"If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job."
"In Beverly Hills they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows."
"Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons."
"Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all."
"I failed to make the chess team because of my height."
"My one regret in life is that I am not someone else."
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